TRANQUILITY
The quality of being calm is such a precious gift. The gift that everybody desires and nobody has. But once in a while, calm and peace is present, even if it is for just one moment.
I have just moved to a new city. I am teaching piano full-time online, taking care of William, who lost his sight just a year ago, and taking care of his two dogs. Then there is cooking, cleaning, laundry, answering the phone, taking the dogs out, and trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing before somebody interrupted me.
A student calls to reschedule his lesson. One dog needs to go outside. The other dog needs a walk. We are out of milk. The laundry needs to be done. Somebody needs something. There is always something. And then there are those very special moments when I manage to escape.
I go into the bathroom. I close the door. I LOCK THE DOOR. And there I am. Alone.
For a few minutes nobody can ask me to do anything because, as far as the rest of the household is concerned, I am unavailable. This is my spa, my meditation retreat. This is my private little corner of civilization. My beautiful bathroom.
I sit there, breathe, and enjoy the incredible luxury of not being needed for a few minutes. I am beginning to understand why people pay good money for massages and retreats. They are paying for what I get by turning a little metal lock. I am not even ashamed of it.
There is something wonderful about being behind a locked door when your entire day consists of people, dogs, chores, lessons, errands, and interruptions. Of course, the peace never lasts very long because eventually there is a knock, or a dog starts scratching at the door.
But for those few minutes, I am left alone. These days, I would happily accept ten minutes. Five would be nice. Two uninterrupted minutes and I might start writing thank-you notes. Maybe that's what calm really is. I'm not talking about a perfect state where nothing is wrong and nobody needs anything. Leave that to a Buddhist Monk. Calm may just simply be having a little space between one demand and the next.
Sometimes that peaceful space is a walk. A lot of times it is a cup of coffee. And other times it is sitting on the toilet, breathing like I have just discovered the secret to inner peace. For the moment the door is locked and the world can wait, well except for the milk... Shit! We are still out of milk.